Joshua Alade, a passionate youth advocate and convener of the annual Dare To Dream Conference talks about what fuels his passion for youths, his recent Tedx engagement and his upcoming projects.
When it comes to raising children, stereotypical pressure abounds in every nook and cranny of the world, but they are most common here in Nigeria among parents. Let’s start from when the child is born, a child of 3 ideally should still be with the mother, playing with toys, trying to explore his or her curiosity, and may be starting kindergarten at 4 or 5, but you find out that a 3 year old is already in school trying to read and write, struggling with the pen and paper as the teacher holds his hands for him or her to write properly, hitting him gently on the back if he doesn’t write well.
My father raised a feminist son because my mother had died and left him with four children. In our quiet apartment in Ikoyi where tall trees cast shadows on the road outside on warm evenings, I learned to do the things that my mother couldn’t do anymore.
Often times I go back to that place—when I am asked to man up as though I were somehow, in my sensitivity, doing a disservice to the brotherhood of men.
They constantly look for growth
They know that the only thing that stands between them and their success are their micro-movements. Consequently,
I was recently traveling in the Highlands of New Guinea, and I was talking with a man who had three wives. I asked him, “How many wives would you like to have?” And there was this long pause, and I thought to myself, “Is he going to say five? Is he going to say 10? Is he going to say 25?” And he leaned towards me and he whispered….
Every parent wants their kids to be successful. It is the purest wish a parent can have. Making this wish a reality is an entirely different matter.
So what ensures a child’s success?
I get into an argument with a man. He slaps me. I feel the pain. Yet they tell me I provoked him.
I get into an argument with a man. I slap him. They tell me I have no respect.
Like I don’t have a right to be angry……..
So, my level of respect for people is judged by my degree of silence in the face of brutality…..